save the pinkos

Yesterday, I received this letter:

Dear mct,

Each year, a number of donors and foundations contribute very generously to [law school]'s scholarship program in the form of endowed funds.

As a scholarship recipient for the 2005-06 academic year, we are pleased to inform you that all, or a portion of the award you received, was funded by the following donor, scholarship fund or foundation: [Mr. Pinko-lover Moneybags].

At this time we ask that you take a moment to thank the donor or the foundation for the support they continue to give our students.

Sincerely,

The kickass people at Financial Aid

When I read this, I felt like one of those third-world children in those Save the Children campaigns. My godparents used to participate in that program, so every time I went to their house, there was always polaroids of random children they sponsored with the 33 cents they saved everyday. I am inspired, therefore, to send pictures of myself making good use of Mr. Moneybags' money at school. A dinky letter can't express my wholehearted appreciation for this education. So I thought I could send pictures of me doing my favorite things:

Sitting at my computer in my corner of the library, alternating between studying evidence, checking out Hollywood gossip at defamer.com, and devising ways to overthrow the system;

Rolling my eyes in class when certain people open their mouths;

Printing reams of cases from Westlaw, only to toss them in the recycling bin;

Mocking the fancy girls pursuing their M.R.S. degrees; and

Scavenging for free food at all the student group functions, including those for BLSA, the Federalist Society, and the Tax Law Society.

To top it all off, I'd bear a toothy grin in each photo, holding up peace signs in each hand. A perfect way to show gratitude indeed.

The above comments are in no way meant to disparage Mr. Moneybags' generous gift. Without it, I most definitely would have already succumbed to a life of doc review.